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general life update
Feb. 7th, 2024 04:22 pm I talked to my psychiatrist yesterday and it went alright. She may reduce some of my medication next time I see her, which will be in a couple of months. She told me she thinks I need to find an activity that forces me to socialize with other people and I'm struggling to think about anything I would enjoy doing with others, but I have enough time to figure that one out.
My family is planning up something for me and my sister's birthday and I feel... kind of upset? They started planning without consulting us, but neither me nor my sister are really into making birthdays a whole event. We're both very withdrawn people so honestly, the best they could have done is leave us alone. I don't know, I just don't really feel like dealing with my extended family. It's exhausting and it feels like they keep finding excuses to get us all together without any consideration of the fact some of us are just not very extroverted, and then if we don't show up they make us feel guilty for it. Not to mention how genuinely uncomfortable my family can sometimes make me feel... so yeah, not looking forward to that.
But yes, my birthday is coming up. I'm turning 20. I feel very neutral about it, I guess? A little upset, I think, but not as much as I have in previous years. My birthday always is a difficult time for me because it feels like a reminder that I haven't really accomplished anything and that I'm still stuck in the same mental illness loops I was years ago. New years is a similar situation for me. But I'm not as upset as I've been before, so that's good.
I recently listened to Taylor Swift's Lover album. I've gotten really into her music recently. I was expecting to find Lover really cheesy, but it was cute, I enjoyed it way more than I was expecting to. I want to hopefully finish all her albums before her new one comes out, but no promises.
I've also been watching Kung Fu Panda: Legends Of Awesomeness, the nick series based on the movies. It's okay, I guess? There are occasional moments of brilliance but the characterization when it comes to Po is really weak. Very unfortunate how there hasn't been a truly great series to come out of these movies, I feel like there's a lot of untapped potential. Regardless, I do intend to finish this show, even if I'm not particularly into it, just for the sake of saying I've watched it.
I've actually been thinking of rewatching the KFP movies this month, but I've watched them so many times already and I have many other things I want to watch. It's that eternal neurodivergent dilema of wanting to rewatch your hyperfixations over and over but also wanting to make time for other things you're interested in. On that topic, I'm pretty excited about the fourth movie, if only because we're finally getting more Tai Lung content after so long.
Today I don't really have plans. I'm hoping to get some studying done today more than anything else. It's been really tedious honestly- Self studying has proven to be both very easy and very difficult at the same time, somehow.
My family is planning up something for me and my sister's birthday and I feel... kind of upset? They started planning without consulting us, but neither me nor my sister are really into making birthdays a whole event. We're both very withdrawn people so honestly, the best they could have done is leave us alone. I don't know, I just don't really feel like dealing with my extended family. It's exhausting and it feels like they keep finding excuses to get us all together without any consideration of the fact some of us are just not very extroverted, and then if we don't show up they make us feel guilty for it. Not to mention how genuinely uncomfortable my family can sometimes make me feel... so yeah, not looking forward to that.
But yes, my birthday is coming up. I'm turning 20. I feel very neutral about it, I guess? A little upset, I think, but not as much as I have in previous years. My birthday always is a difficult time for me because it feels like a reminder that I haven't really accomplished anything and that I'm still stuck in the same mental illness loops I was years ago. New years is a similar situation for me. But I'm not as upset as I've been before, so that's good.
I recently listened to Taylor Swift's Lover album. I've gotten really into her music recently. I was expecting to find Lover really cheesy, but it was cute, I enjoyed it way more than I was expecting to. I want to hopefully finish all her albums before her new one comes out, but no promises.
I've also been watching Kung Fu Panda: Legends Of Awesomeness, the nick series based on the movies. It's okay, I guess? There are occasional moments of brilliance but the characterization when it comes to Po is really weak. Very unfortunate how there hasn't been a truly great series to come out of these movies, I feel like there's a lot of untapped potential. Regardless, I do intend to finish this show, even if I'm not particularly into it, just for the sake of saying I've watched it.
I've actually been thinking of rewatching the KFP movies this month, but I've watched them so many times already and I have many other things I want to watch. It's that eternal neurodivergent dilema of wanting to rewatch your hyperfixations over and over but also wanting to make time for other things you're interested in. On that topic, I'm pretty excited about the fourth movie, if only because we're finally getting more Tai Lung content after so long.
Today I don't really have plans. I'm hoping to get some studying done today more than anything else. It's been really tedious honestly- Self studying has proven to be both very easy and very difficult at the same time, somehow.
